Relishing Motherhood and New Milestones

What a difference a week makes!! Last week, Ari and I were adjusting to each other in America. She was sweet last week, but there was still bonding to be done between us. It was a battle of the wills, as I tried to keep her on a sleep schedule and tried my best to meet her needs.

Last week, motherhood seemed so unfulfilling, but this week, it's been the high point of my life. Today I held her in my arms and nearly cried of happiness, thinking how my 14-year-old dream of having a child finally has come to fruition and how very lucky and blessed I am.

I live my life in moments rather than days and hours because I want to savor and relish this time between the two of us. And with a toddler, I am only human: I relish bedtime for my precious one. After all, she needs her sleep and mama needs to have some leisure time.

Before going to China, I was afraid of losing myself by becoming a mom. I was afraid I'd have no time for my crafts of oil painting and writing. However, I am now creative when carving out leisure time.

Generally, I get to bed a bit early (with the exception of tonight), so I'm up at 5 a.m. writing or oil painting when Ari is sleeping. Those 2-3 hours are crucial to keep me sane, and when Ari awakens, I can focus all my time on her. I believe that moms must nuture themselves before they are able to do so for their children.

Also, this week we hit a milestone: Ari started being able to feed herself with her fingers!! I was so proud of her. This week, which is early yet, she was so gurgly and smiled a lot. She is easy to please, and her smile is wonderful -- she smiles and laughs and sings all the time. And I'm loving it.

Another milestone is that Ari met my best friend Nicole this past weekend:



And I made a milestone myself: I laugh and smile so much more -- all because of my lovely angel.

Beth L. Gainer is a professional writer and has published numerous academic and magazine articles, as well as an essay on her breast cancer experience in the anthology Voices of Breast Cancer by LaChance Publishing. She writes about medical advocacy at www.bethlgainer.blogspot.com, and her cat Hemi blogs at www.catterchatter.blogspot.com. Beth teaches writing and literature at Robert Morris University in the Chicago area. She can be contacted at bethlgainer@gmail.com and gainercallingtheshots@gmail.com. She also blogs on the adventures of her cats, Hemi and Cosette, at http://www.catterchatter.blogspot.com./.